I am a Whovian

Unabashed, Doctor Who loving, fan girl out about Chin Boy loving Whovian. It’s a show that makes me cry and laugh, and really hope that there is a tiny blue box whizzing around space.

And I truly loathe the 12th doctor.

I tried. I really did. I know, from past regenerations that I always hate the new doctor for at least a few episodes. Then, I fall madly fan girl in love with him again.

Not so with 12.

I could not explain it to the other Whovians I watch the show with (Shout out to Kathryn and Christine!). They loved him, and I was “meh” about him for whole season. He had a few moments of redemption, but for me I was just like “eh”.

And after thinking about it, I’ve finally figured out why I truly dislike him.

He’s at best snarky, and frequently flat out rude to many people (even Clara, his companion). He shows little overt compassion, and I would argue little compassion at all, for those around him. He is, in a word, selfish. Sure, he has occasional moments of kindness–but for the most part he’s a selfish jerk.

And if this is a truer representation of the Doctor (as many posts and articles, and hell, even the show) have argued: I want no part.

I don’t dislike him because he’d older or less handsome or less quirky than 10 or Chin boy.

I dislike him because he’s mean and bitter.

The universe has enough of that. There’s enough anger and bitterness to fill several galaxies. The Doctor *thought he* destroyed his race to save the universe. And it made it him kind.

From the Beast Below (5.2)

Amy: The Star Whale didn’t come like a miracle all those years ago – it volunteered! You didn’t have to trap it or torture it, that was all just you! It came because it couldn’t stand to watch your children cry. What if you were really old, and really kind and alone, your whole race dead, no future. What couldn’t you do then? If you were that old, and that kind… and the very last of your kind. You couldn’t just stand there and watch children cry

The Doctor: You couldn’t have known how it would react.

Amy Pond: I couldn’t, but I’ve seen it before. Very old, and very kind and the very, very last, sound a bit familiar?

The Doctor wins because he does what is right. The Doctor is the Doctor because he killed his race and it made him kind. 12 is going through something–which is fine, we’re all allowed our dark periods. But 12 is not my Doctor. And he is not the Doctor that the universe so badly needs. Kindness and love are the most powerful force in the universe. Not snark, not mean. The Doctor used to know that. I hope he finds it out again.

(And for the record, I know that 9, 10, and 11 all had their dark moments. But they were just that–moments. They were seeking not to be snarky, but to be good to the universe. And yes, I understand that from  a thematic stand point, the Doctor was clearly paying penance during his ninth, tenth and eleventh regeneration for destroying Gallifrey.  But that’s my point–if this is a truer representation of the Doctor–I resign my fan girlness. I want no part of him)